Wufei 1/2
A Gundam Wing / Ranma 1/2 crossover
Part Two
By Raye Johnsen


 "Kidou Senki Gundam Wing" is copyright Bandai, Sunrise, Viz Communications, Mixx Entertainment and other associated parties.  "Ranma 1/2" is copyright Takahashi Rumiko, Shogakukan and Viz Communications.  In other words, they're not mine.
 [holds composure]
 [holds composure]
 [loses composure]
 IT ISN'T FAAAAIIIIIRRRR!!!!!

Please remember: this is an Alternate Universe, so the events with which you are familiar may or may not occur; and secondly, this fic's only reason for existing is to make you smile. If it succeeds, cool. If it doesn't, well, I'm sorry. Either way, do not take it seriously.


Part the Second: Roles

I am very, very confused. Do not make any cracks, okay? I get enough from Hiiro already, and he doesn't even know about this.

It started when we all started meeting up again after New Edwards. Quatre, of course, was the one who stated the obvious - "If we're going to be fighting together, surely it's more efficient to pool resources," he said - so we started living together. High school boys rooming together while attending school, having been sent by anxious parents far away from the fighting. Pretty good alibi, don't you think? Reason for lack of parental units, limiting social contact (hey, we're little lost lambs clinging together for protection - who just happen to carry Berettas in wrist holsters) and built-in excuse for skipping town when the nearby OZ base went boom, all in one.

The walk to wherever we'd managed to stash the Gundams outside whichever town we were in was usually over two hours, and murderous. Earth is a nice place, but as far as I'm concerned, ecology is something that can happen to other people. The further away the better.

But I was talking about 'Fei.

After we all started living together, 'Fei seemed really modest. I'm talking really modest. Taking showers after midnight. Never wandering around without a shirt.

The other three seemed prepared to leave it alone. So WuFei was modest. Hiiro and Trowa let the matter go. In fact, Trowa started doing the same thing. He told me it was because when he was a mercenary, it was almost impossible to get a moment to oneself, so privacy was a rare treasure to be savoured. Hiiro literally didn't care. It didn't interfere with WuFei's missions and it wasn't his business, therefore he ignored it.

Quatre cornered WuFei and talked at our elusive modest pilot, but didn't get any answers. For some reason, though, Quatre was satisfied.

I wasn't.

I didn't charge in on WuFei in the shower - I'm not that much of a barbarian, thank you - but in the less-private areas of tooth-cleaning and hair-combing, I would come in and chat at my Chinese ally.

After all, in this business, the more friends the better, right?

So I went in one morning, because I thought WuFei was finished and all that remained of the morning ablutions was the hair-combing, which I felt qualified to give advice on. As one long-haired person to another, you understand. In a world where short hair seems to be favoured, us lovely-locked people have got to stick together.

So I came barging in....

All together now: Du~uo is an i~idiot....

WuFei wasn't getting dressed from the shower, but getting undressed for the shower. And I saw why shirtless wasn't an option for WuFei. It's not exactly what you'd call appropriate for girls, after all.

She stared at me for one stupefied second, then literally leapt into the tub and pulled the shower curtain. "Get OUT, Maxwell!" she shrieked.

I hadn't actually seen anything - the cloth she used to bind her breasts was still covering them, though it had been loosened enough for me to see her shape, and she was wearing boxers - but still. I mumbled an apology and stumbled out.


She accepted my apology, and as luck would have it, we headed off for a mission that afternoon.

I say 'we', but it was really her mission. I went along for the ride, though.

Yes, yes, I know, girls can do anything etcetera. And 'Fei was certainly capable of dishing out the damage. I'd seen her do it often enough. But letting her go off into danger by herself was not an option. I guess at heart I'm an old-fashioned kind of guy.

You'd think the OZ guys knew that she was more vulnerable or something. She seemed to be the target-of-the-day and I couldn't do anything to make DeathScythe a more attractive proposition to the Oz drones. They really wanted ShenLong's pilot. Well, Shinigami wasn't going to let the Spirit of Justice fall into their hands! I took advantage of their concentration to attack. It was pathetically easy - as if they were so focused on her that they'd forgotten she had a backup.

She told me off on the way back to our Gundams' hiding places. For security, we never hid them together. I let her rant at me. Hey, she was here to rant. I'd seen what happened to girls, alone, at the mercy of a bunch of guys, especially if those men had a reason to be pissed off at her. It hadn't happened to her, because I was there, and I think she realized that. She didn't call me an idiot, or a fool. She did complain that I had 'gone charging into unnecessary danger' and that she'd been 'perfectly capable of dealing with the situation'. I didn't argue. Much.

When we returned to the safehouse we'd chosen, 'Fei retreated to our room and began to meditate.

"Hey, it wasn't your fault," I opened the discussion.

She opened one eye. "My fault about what?"

"About whatever you're upset about."

She opened both eyes at that one. I ignored the fact that they were looking at the ceiling. She shut them again and said, "I am not upset. I am attempting to meditate."

"Oh, come on, 'Fei," I said. "Give your roommate some credit. You only do this when you're upset about something."

She sighed. "My name is Chang WuFei. It is most disrespectful to address anyone by their given name without permission, Maxwell. Kindly pay me the respect I give you, and address me properly."

"Ah," I said, enlightened. "Well then, you may call me 'Duo'; may I call you 'Fei'?"

She opened her moonless-night eyes and looked at me. "And if I do not give permission, you will do so anyway, will you not?" Her lips twitched and then she smiled. "Very well, Duo - since you asked."