This is something a little different from the other 
crossovers you've no doubt seen. I've tried to catch the spirit 
of both worlds without making it too much like one or the other. 
Despite the names shared by these characters with their 
originals, the characters may not necessarily act the way their 
namesakes would. Keep it in mind. I've tried to make it a bit 
more mature, but still keeping a bit of absurdity to keep things 
interesting. Also keep in mind that there are quite a number of 
cameos from various sources. Spot them all and win a prize! (Not 
cash, sorry...) Please send C&C and any suggestions on the story 
to [email protected].  

	Standard fanfic disclaimer averring that all characters, 
situations,  places and events with even a vague resemblance to 
the work of Rumiko Takahashi, Fujishima Kosuke's, CLAMP, whoever 
did Koko  wa  Greenwood or any one of a number of works, probably 
was borrowed in  the  first place. Apologies to all. Rights are 
to whoever owns them. Don't bother to sue, though. I'm broke.

PART III: Of Devoted Worshipers and Unexpected Jealousies

	It was the end of the semestral break. Now that the  
repairs to  the  school  buildings  were complete  (some  of  
which  were severely  damaged  when  the Chemistry Lab  had  
blown  up one evening under mysterious  circumstances, involving 
a flying woman and a student, but that's besides the point) 
classes would resume  this Monday. Ranma was not particularly 
looking forward to going  back to the academic grind, but he 
didn't have much of a choice. If he wanted  to  keep  his 
athletic scholarship, he had  to  keep  his grades above a 
certain level as well. On the upshot, at least  he would be 
getting out of Ucchan's, even if only during the day. Much as 
Ranma didn't want to admit it to Ukyou, he was starting to get 
sick of okonomiyaki...
      Since he, Akane and Ranko had moved in, the place had 
become a  madhouse.  Akane shared Ukyou's guest room  with  Ranko  
while Ranma had gotten the back room of the restaurant. They 
helped out around  Ucchan's  whenever  necessary and  Ukyou's  
business  had actually improved because of the handsome new 
waiter (Ranma)  and cute new waitresses (Akane and Ranko).  
      Add  to  that Ranko picking on Akane and Ranma,  Akane's  
tendency  to violently  retaliate  with her hammer, Ukyou  and  
Akane  getting mildly  jealous  over what each thought the other 
had  with Ranma (this  was especially  bad  for Akane who was 
known to  cause  thunderstorms when  in  an particularly foul 
mood), Ranko slinking  around  the restaurant, flirting with 
anything that moves, and every so often transforming  Ranma,  
plus everyone occasionally  walking  in  on Ranma in the bath and 
him getting beaten up for it... it all came down to a rather 
complicated domestic situation. And they'd  only been staying 
there for less than three weeks, and thus far, Ranma had been 
entirely able to avoid letting on about his 'problem' to Ukyou... 
despite Ranko's almost daily attempts to transform him... It was 
actually quite lucky that Ukyou got along well with all three, 
otherwise they might have found themselves homeless again.
      Ranma  hadn't given up on finding a place just for  him  
and the  goddesses. Despite Ukyou's good cheer and  protestations  
to the  contrary, Ranma could see that her patience with  the  
other two was starting to wear thin. Ranma didn't want to impose 
on her too much.
      She  was still pretty much the same girl he'd  been  
friends with   back  in  Furinkan  High  School,  in Tokyo, 
except for a tendency to cross dress on a daily basis. 
Unfortunately, they'd lost touch with one another after they went 
to  college.  The last he'd heard Ukyou was going  to  marry  her 
boyfriend,  some guy she'd met in Kyoto. She didn't want to  talk 
about it and Ranma certainly wasn't about to pry.
      Ranma  stepped out of the tub and shook out of  his  
reverie just  in time to hear someone trying to open the door.  
For  some strange  reason,  the locks on the doors of the  bath  
tended  to open by  themselves  whenever Ranma  inside. They 
suspected Ranko, but there was never any evidence for it. He  
called  out, "Nearly done! Please, wait outside!"
      "Oh. Sorry, Ranma!" called back a voice which he  
recognized as Akane's. Ranma had learned to be more alert since 
he'd started living  with the goddesses. Between Akane's temper 
and Ranko's harassment, every day was a new  opportunity  for 
training.
      Ranma  stepped  out of the bathroom, fully dressed  and  
saw Akane sitting on the landing. He called, "Hi, Akane. Your 
turn."
      She  stood  up,  smiling, "Thank you,  Ranma.  Do  you  
have classes today?"
      Ranma nodded, "Only until one. Then I'll be out looking  
for another apartment-"
      From upstairs, Ukyou stepped out of her apartment and 
walked to  the  bath. "Ranchan, how many times do  I have to  
tell  you that you're always welcome to stay for as long as you 
like!  That goes for your girlfriend as well," Ukyou said smiling 
at Akane.
      Akane  blushed mildly at that. She was starting to get  
used to  being called that... but somehow it still didn't  quite  
feel right when Ukyou said it for some reason. Well... it was 
easier for her to be called that than his fiance...
      Ranma neither confirmed nor denied their status, but he  
did put a discreet hand on her shoulder as he said, "But not for  
her cousin, huh?"
      "I  heard  that,  Saotome!!" came a sleepy  voice  from  
the apartment, "You'll pay!"
      Ukyou noted the gesture with amusement. Ranma always  
stayed close to Akane. Especially when it seemed likely that 
Ranko would get mad  at him  for some reason. But besides that, 
Ranma tended to be  close to Akane whenever possible. Every so 
often he would put a hand on her  shoulder or brush against her.  
As far as Ukyou knew, Ranma never was one for intimacy... his 
father (an old imbecile in her opinion) raised Ranma up to be a 
rugged, macho, he-man... complete with all the appropriate 
problems at open displays of affection. But when he was with 
Akane, Ukyou noticed, with just a little jealousy... he always 
had time to be.... well... close to her. 
      Akane  knew why. She threw Ranma a sour look of  amusement. 
He  was  mostly worried that Ranko would try to turn him  into  a 
woman. Again. Just like Ranko tried almost every single day since 
they moved in. Akane knew that Ranma occasionally fell  into 
depressions  just  thinking  about what  would  happen  if  Ranko 
transformed  him and Akane weren't there. He would never  become  
a man  again...  Truth to tell, the longest he'd had to spend as 
a woman so far was under an hour., but the possibility of it 
becoming permanent was rather unsettling for him.
	Aside  from  that,  it  was  tough  enough   being 
transformed into another gender by a woman's touch, but trying to 
keep  it secret from someone who used to be your best friend  who 
was living under the same roof at the same time...
      "Whatever,"  said Ranma with a shrug,  "I'm going  
apartment hunting anyway, Ucchan. I don't want to impose on you 
so much."
      "That's my Ranchan alright," Ukyou said with a smile. Akane 
felt  a  stab  of jealousy. Ukyou's pet name  for  Ranma always 
grated on her. It was  an indication of the history they'd 
shared. Something, Akane  didn't have...
      Ukyou noticed Akane starting to space out and asked, 
"Akane, mind if I join you?"
      Akane was jolted out of her musings but nodded, "Sure."
      Ranma  said, "Okay, I'll just clean up down  stairs...  
I've got  to  get out of here by eight or I'll never get  to  
class  in time."
      After  Ukyou  had entered Akane turned to  Ranma  and  
said, "Ranma... would you let me come with you?"
      "Hmm..?" said Ranma as he turned to Akane, "Why?"
      "I don't know... I just want to see what you actually do  
in school... Besides, the last time I left Ucchan's was days 
ago."
	"Well...  I  don't see why not. You aren't working  a  
shift today, anyway, right?"
      "No, she's not!" called out Ukyou from the bath.
      "Okay, then. I'll wait for you," he said smiling.
      "And  no peeking, Ranma!" Akane added from behind the  
door. It  was  a joke. In the short time that she'd  known  him,  
she'd learned  quite  a  bit about him. Ranma was  actually  
quite  shy around women except around those he was comfortable 
with or  with women who so infuriated him that he didn't think 
clearly anymore. Ukyou was the former, Ranko was the latter, and 
Akane could  slip into either category depending on her temper at 
the time.
      Akane  stripped down and entered the bath with  Ukyou.  
They weren't  quite  close,  but they were already  on  their  
way  to becoming  good friends. The fact that Ranma liked the  
other  was already a good indicator in the other one's eyes.
      They  had small talk as they bathed, about how the  
business was  doing,  what the weather was like and whether or  
not  Akane could borrow some of Ukyou's clothes for the day... 
She didn't have anything truly feminine, but Akane didn't mind.
      "He really likes you." said Ukyou suddenly.
      "Huh?  Um...  what  do  you  mean?"  asked  Akane   
feigning ignorance.
      "C'mon...  neither of you say much about it, but I  can  
see it. He always wants to be near you... he always apologizes  
after he's rude to you (he doesn't even do that to me)... he 
hides like crazy when his groupies come calling... He's trying 
his best to  keep you happy."
      Akane furrowed as she considered Ranma's actions. She 
didn't like  admitting  her thoughts out loud. She worried if  
that  was really why he stayed close to her, "No, he just has to 
keep me  happy because of Ranko."
      "Ranko?  Why?" asked Ukyou, "What does she have to  do  
with anything?"
      "You see, Ranma needs me to--" she stopped herself  
suddenly as she realized that Ranma had sworn her to secrecy 
regarding his transformations, "Er... ah, that is..."
      "Now that you mentioned it... You guys never did tell me 
why Ranko  was with you. One time, Ranko told me that you and 
Ranchan had  run off  together  because  he couldn't live without  
you,  but  that doesn't explain her and--"
      "That's  a lie!" Akane interrupted suddenly, "Um... I  
mean, let's  just say I had my Father's blessing... but Ranko was  
part of the deal..."
      "Complicated situation, huh?"
      "You don't know the half of it, Ukyou."
      Ukyou smiled, "Regardless... I know you're good for my  
Ranchan. Take good care of him Akane," Ukyou added hugging her.
      "Thanks," said Akane, genuinely touched.
      "What a lovely scene. I think I may weep openly," said 
Ranko with overblown drama, from the door. Complete with dabbing 
at the corners  of  her  eyes with a hanky,  she  continued,  "Is  
there something Ranma should know Akane? Maybe, Ukyou is more 
masculine than she cares to admit..."
      Akane  shot her a dangerous look, "What are you doing  
here, harridan?"
      "I wanted a bath too, tomboy."
      "So  take  a  bath already! I  was  just  leaving!"  
without another word, Akane grabbed her clothes and towel and 
stormed off to change.
      As  Ranko slipped into the water, Ukyou who had watched  
the exchange, asked, "Why are you so mean to her?"
      Ranko frowned at Ukyou and answered sharply, "It's her 
fault I'm  stuck here. Her and Saotome's. And if she weren't too 
busy making googly eyes at him, we'd probably have left already."
      "All three of you?" Ukyou said, with a touch of sorrow.
      "No. Just me and her..."
      Ukyou  felt  an  spark of hope... Akane  might  still  
leave Ranma.  She quickly squelched that thought, though. But  
she  was still curious.
      "What precisely do you have to do?"
      Ranko  felt Ukyou's emotions as well, she was after all  
the Goddess  of Affection, but she'd never been paying  attention  
to Ukyou before. The cross dresser of all people. The only woman 
Ranko had met so far who was even more masculine than her tomboy 
cousin! Ukyou was in  love with  Ranma...  It  was a desperate 
kind of love  people  on  the rebound usually display. But 
powerful... She was too in love with him to try anything, though, 
because he already looked happy with Akane... Ranko's mouth 
quirked. Was everyone in love with Saotome? She wondered what he 
had that made women fall for him... but quickly pushed it aside. 
After all... if Ukyou needed help in a matter of the heart, 
didn't it stand to reason that the Goddess  of Affection should 
help? Just the right spell in the right place...
      "Nothing  important," said Ranko dismissively, "By the  
way, where is Akane going in such a hurry?"

      Ranma's van had certainly seen better days. It was old,  
but reliable.  It  took about an half an hour to get to  the  
campus, because  of  the traffic, but they made it with  time  to  
spare. Which  was good. Because a large crowd of women was  
waiting  for the van at the parking lot.
      "Okay,  Akane.  Here we are," said Ranma as  he  opened  
his door.  Akane  got  out  ahead  of  him  and  noticed  the   
crowd approaching.  Loud  babbling erupted from the throng as  
soon  as they saw Akane.
      "Is it usually so crowded?" she asked, worried.
      "No..."  said  Ranma cautiously. He stayed in  the  van  
and peered  out  cautiously. He recognized some of the faces  in  
the crowd. It was his fan club. He should have expected this. 
      "Oh  boy," he said as he surveyed the mob which was  
rapidly closing  in.  They did not look happy at all.  "They're  
all  out there."
      Akane walked over to Ranma's side and looked at him  
through the vehicle's doorway, "Well? What do we do about them?"
      "We  can  try  to make a break for it  I  guess--"  he  
said dubiously.
      "Hey, Saotome!" came a voice from dashboard. Ranma and 
Akane looked  down and saw mini-Ranko balancing on his steering  
wheel, "Ever wondered what it would be like to go to school as a 
girl?"
      "Wha--" Ranma blurted out, as Ranko jumped from the 
steering wheel and onto his head. She promptly disappeared again 
in a puff of  smoke.  Ranma realized belatedly that Ranko  had  
gotten  him again.
      "Aw  jeez!  Why did she have to do that now!?"  Ranma  
said, surveying her body.
      "Nobody's  close  enough to see you yet, here,"  Akane  
said offering her hand.
      "Thanks," Ranma said, taking her hand as he exited the  
van. He was back to normal before anyone else could notice. There  
was a  collective  gasp as the mob saw Ranma exiting his  van,  
being helped out by some girl.
      The  horde  rushed  in  immediately,  preventing  escape.  
A confused babble of sounds assaulted the two as everyone tried  
to ask questions simultaneously.
      Snatches  of coherent words could be heard  though,  
"Ranma-sama, say it isn't so!", "Is it true?", "You can't do this 
to me, Ranma, I've been saving myself for you!", "Ranma! Why 
her?!"
      Akane  growled low in the back of her throat. This  was  
too much.  She'd  had enough. From the cloudless sky,  a  
thunderclap roared  through the parking lot, its sound blasting 
the crowd  of women to silence.
      "That's enough!" said Akane, "One at a time!"
      One  of  the girls, a redhead with a waist  length braid, 
in a red dress, pressed closer immediately and said, "We heard 
from  Ryoga-sempai and Mousse-sempai that you got kicked out of 
the dorm because you were caught sneaking women in there."
      Ranma had somehow managed to get behind Akane and seemed  
to be using her as a shield, "I didn't sneak them in!" he said.
      "It's  true  then! There were women there?" asked  the  
same girl.
      "I didn't say that!!" said Ranma desperately.
      "We  also  heard that you were living with  three  
beautiful women now!" complained a girl in a blue dress which 
suited her long, straight, blue hair.
      "Where'd  you hear that?" asked Ranma, who had been more  
or less  hiding from everyone since he was kicked out.  Nobody  
knew where he was staying.
      "A  redhead  woman with a braid..."  shyly  replied  a  
brunette wearing glasses and a green dress. The other women  
quickly  nodded  in agreement.
      Akane muttered under her breath, "Ranko."
      "Yes, that was her name, I think." interjected a  woman 
with long  ginger locks tied into a ponytail that reached the 
back  of her  knees, "The same girl told me that you told this 
other  girl you wanted her to stay with you for the rest of your 
life!" There were more nods and murmurs of agreement.
      Akane's reserves of patience, not too long to begin with 
had given out, "What business is it of yours anyway!?"
      The crowd broke into general babbling again as various 
cries to  the  effect of "Is it her?", "Is she the one your  
heart  has chosen?",  "Why not me?!" and various permutations  
thereof  were echoed.
      Ranma  was  still in shock. His fans never used to  be  
this aggressive or self-assertive.
      Another thunderclap blasted them back to silence. Akane  
was really  angry now. She took Ranma by the arm and said, "I'm  
only saying  this  once!  I am Akane Tendo and  Ranma  is  my..."  
she hesitated,  but  anger overruled any  embarrassment,  
"Boyfriend!" 
 	"Anybody who has a problem with that, deals with me!" She  
put her other hand to her hammer, which she still  wore all  the 
time,  as though just asking for an excuse to use it.  A few of 
the women stepped back. A number of them shrugged.  They'd been  
claiming that Ranma was their boyfriend for months now,  so who 
was this newcomer?
      "Why  not  let Ranma answer us, then?"  asked  a  
reasonable sounding woman in a black dress.
      All  eyes  turned to Ranma. Not just the mob,  but  quite  
a number of people who were merely passing by. He was suddenly  
the center of attention. "Um..." he began.
      "Well?"  asked Akane glaring at him. She'd put her pride  
on the line here. If he backed down, she intended to wallop him  
six feet into the concrete.
      "She's... uh... not exactly... that is to say..."
      "She isn't your girlfriend?" asked everyone simultaneously.
      Akane's  face flushed red with rage and  embarrassment.  
Her grip tightened on her hammer. That stupid idiot..!
      "...  I  think...  um...  maybe... fiance  might  actually  
be   more accurate," finished Ranma quickly, now also blushing.
      Everyone was shocked into silence. The quiet was  
eventually broken  by  a few broken sobs as most of the women  
drifted  off. Most  crying,  a rare few, their faces bitter.  
Ranma  and  Akane watched them leave and heaved a sigh of relief. 
Only the woman in the black dress took the news impassively. She 
had a faint  smile on her face as idly played with a single black 
rose.
      "What?" asked Akane, not ready to put down her hammer.
      "I  just wanted to congratulate the lucky woman who  
managed to  land the infamous Ranma Saotome." said the girl in 
the  black dress, pleasantly, "Akane Tendo, wasn't it?"
      "Yes." Akane said bowing slightly.
      "Pleased  to meet you, I am Kodachi Kuno.  Sometimes  
called the  Black  Rose," she turned to Ranma, "I'm going  to  
miss  the antics of those women trying to attract your attention, 
Ranma. It was..." she paused slightly, "Quite amusing. I hope you 
two  have a lovely life together," she gave Ranma a quick peck on 
the cheek before anyone could react, "Good bye."
      She slipped away before either could say another word.
      "Who was that?" asked Akane, confused by Kodachi's speech.
      "She's  the Captain of the Female Division Combat  
Athletics Team,"  said Ranma nervously, "She's usually  rather  
volatile... I've   never   seen  her  that  calm  before,"   
Ranma   shivered involuntarily at the memory.
      Akane turned to Ranma and asked tentatively, "Did you 
really mean that? I mean about us being engaged? Was that a 
formal proposal?"
      Ranma,  still  a  bit of a nervous wreck, "NO!"  then  in  
a calmer voice, "No. Of course not. I had to tell them something 
to make  them  go  away. Just telling them you  were  my  
girlfriend wouldn't have been enough. Besides... that's what's on 
our contract, right?"
      "Hmph," said Akane, hurt, "Oh. Well, in that case I'm glad 
I was of some help then," her words were laced with sarcasm.
      "Akane, I didn't mean that like it sounded..."
      "What do you think it sounded like, huh?" Akane sniffed at 
him.
      "Like I didn't like you... because its... um... You know. 
Sort of... like... um... "
      Akane's  expression softened a little. He was so  cute  
when she  had him flustered. She gave him a little tap on the 
back  of the head with her smaller hammer.
      "Come on, you pervert... you're going to be late for 
class," she said with a smile.
      He smiled back as they went into the building.
      From  inside  the van, mini-Ranko watched them.  Maybe  
they thought they'd gotten away, she mused, not a chance of that.  
The Black  Rose  woman  had quite a bit of  useful  jealousy  in  
her heart...

      As  Ranma walked the hallway with Akane, a few  more  
people and  some friends came up to him asking for confirmation  
of  the rumors.  Mostly he just nodded and smiled and introduced 
them  to Akane. Some reactions were a little different though. 
The  school lecher  clung to Ranma desperately and begged him to 
say that  it wasn't  so, that his idol hadn't fallen, and so 
forth.  Every  so often he  made an attempt to fondle Akane, 
which earned him quite a  few  bumps and no satisfaction at all. 
It took  a  while,  but Ranma  and  Akane eventually managed to 
get rid of him  when  his  green  haired girlfriend flew by and 
dragged him off,  delivering electric shocks to him every few 
steps.
      "Darling, you're making a spectacle of yourself again!"  
she told  him as she pulled the battered lecher along the  
corridors. His yelps of pain fading in the distance.
      "There sure are a large number of weirdoes in this school."
      "That's the funny part, Akane. I don't remember them  
acting so... extreme before the sem break."
      "Are you saying? That it's my fault?" Akane asked, 
offended.
      "Well... not necessarily yours, Akane-chan."
      "Yes,"  she conceded, "If that incident back in the  
parking lot is any indication at all, Ranko is really looking to 
stir  up some trouble. We'd better be alert."
      "Nihao, Saotome-sempai," called out a voice behind them 
with a bad Chinese accent. Ranma and Akane turned to see a timid 
young girl  in  a conservative dress. She wore glasses and  her  
purple hair  was  done up in a severe braid. She said in  a  
sympathetic voice, "Shampoo heard news from Mousse-sempai. So 
sorry you  kick out of dorm."
      "It's  okay, Shampoo. I'm doing alright. This is  Akane,  
by the  way. Akane, this is Shampoo she's an exchange  student  
from China and one of my friends..."
      The girls exchanged bows. Shampoo peered at Akane for a  
few moments then said excitedly, "Oh! Shampoo, remember now! You  
the one  they talking about in parking lot. They talk about  
marks on face and big hammer! Ranma fiance! Yes? Yes?" she 
punctuated  her sentence with nods.
      Akane smiled at her enthusiasm and nodded too. Ranma  
looked around  rather  embarrassed as people who hadn't heard  
about  it picked up the rumor and spread it along.
      "Shampoo have to go now, Sempai, Akane. Shampoo have to 
meet Mousse-sempai.  He tutoring Shampoo to speak language  
betterer!" she seemed to get particularly giggly and excited at 
the thought. She happily waved goodbye as she dashed off.
      "Lively, isn't she?" Akane asked as Shampoo left.
      "You could say that," Ranma conceded with amusement.
      "Why is she named after a hair care product?" asked Akane.
      "Well, it's customary in their village or something. I 
don't think it means the same thing in Chinese. It's the way you 
pronounce it... I think they say it Xian Pu or something like 
that. Mousse is from the same village. Joketsu-something or the 
other..."
      As the pair neared the door to the class room, they were 
met by  a  man  in an elegantly tailored  three  piece  suit.  He  
had  a mane of finely groomed black  hair  and  wore a pair of 
expensive horn rimmed glasses.  He  approached them and said, 
"Truly, it is said that even the most wretched  of dogs has his 
day, Saotome."
      Ranma pulled a sour face as he saw who it was, "Hey, Kuno."
      "Is  this then the fair lady who has ventured  to  
transform the  most lecherous  Ranma  Saotome, into a  model  of  
virtue?"  Kuno continued,  facing  Akane, "You make a noble  
sacrifice  for  the members of the fairer sex, dear lady. For it 
will be through your efforts do you rid them of their unhealthy 
fascination with him." 
      Akane's  face betrayed confusion as Kuno proceeded with  
his speech,  lambasting  Ranma  and proclaiming  Akane's  virtue  
and nobility  and that she should have courage and  perseverance  
for the arduous task of keeping Ranma in line. 
      "Kuno,  I've  got  a class to get to. Is there  a  point  
to this?" Ranma interrupted, unable to stand any more.
      "Verily, Saotome, you are the most ill-mannered of curs. 
You wish  my  purpose then for stopping you in these halls,  I  
shall give  it to you.  I merely wished for a chance to meet the  
saint who  has managed to capture the most notorious playboy in  
Nekomi City and to congratulate you both."
      "Um... Thank you," said Akane not sure what else to say.
      Ranma  smiled as well. Kuno could be an overblown jerk  
most of time and he was another of Ranma's major rivals because 
of Kuno's Combat Athletics Club which frequently entered into 
rivalry with the Martial Arts Varsity,  but he had a  decent  
streak  underneath, "Thanks, Kuno."
      "I shall be on my way, then. Fare thee well," he said with 
a curt nod as he strode away.
      "Who was that?" asked Akane as they entered the class room.
      "Tatewaki  Kuno, Kodachi's brother. We generally don't  
like each  other much. Mostly because I'm a better fighter than 
he  is and a lot of the time, he ends up trying to ask out women 
who are after  me-"
	"Well, aren't we Mr. Modesty..." Akane smirked.
	Ranma continued smiling a little, "It's true... anyway, he 
probably figures now that I have you, they'll  give up on me and 
go after him..."
      "Which  is  what had better happen,"  said  Akane  
severely. Ranma  merely  gave her a look of mild surprise, 
"Seemed  like  a nice enough person," she added.
      "Yeah, you have to admit he is," conceded Ranma, "At  
times. A bit arrogant though. And a little stubborn. And stupid. 
And--"
	"I think you've made your point, Ranma..." said Akane 
sourly.
      They sat down near the front. In short order the teacher,  
a burly man in his forties, arrived and immediately noticed  
Akane, "Excuse me, miss. Are you in this class?"
      "She's auditing it, Onsen-sensei," responded Ranma quickly.
      "I asked her, not you, Saotome." said the teacher  gruffly, 
"If you're not registered for this class, please step out. No sit 
ins."
      "Oh great," muttered Ranma to himself.
      "Now, please," said the teacher impatiently.
      "Um...  I'll go wait in the van then. I don't want to  
cause any more trouble for you."
      "No,  I  have a better idea. The cafeteria's just  down  
the hall  and around the corner. Why don't you get something to  
eat, you skipped breakfast again... I'll catch up with you in 
about an hour or two, okay?"
      "Saotome. Miss. We don't have all day, " the teacher 
remarked in a bored voice.
      "Sorry,  sensei,"  Ranma replied, then turned to  Akane  
and said, "Be careful and try not to attract too much attention," 
      As  Akane walked out of the classroom she gave Ranma a  
last backwards  glance  and a smile. Ranma smiled back and  waved  
her out.  This  of course sparked an entirely new set of  rumors  
and stories  spreading as the teacher began the lesson. Unnoticed  
by everyone, Ranko, in her superdeformed mode trailed after 
Akane.

      Akane found the cafeteria with no problems. She had a 
little pocket  money, mostly tips from Ucchan's, which she used  
to  get herself some food. She was so upset with Ranko this 
morning  that she  had  entirely  forgotten to eat. She chose a  
table  in  the corner  and tried to make herself as inconspicuous  
as  possible. Little chance of that. The story about her and 
Ranma was  already so   widespread  that  practically  everyone  
knew  her  by   the description. Not that she could hide her 
facial markings, nor was a five foot long mallet all that easy to 
hide either.
      Without  her  realizing it, several dozen  men  had  
already moved  into the closest tables and had begun to subtly  
look  her over.  They  liked what they saw. In fact, they loved  
what  they saw.  In a matter of minutes, practically every man 
who had  seen her  (and  a  few women as well) were firmly  in  
love  with  the goddess of conflicts, Akane Tendo. Most were 
almost ready to work up  the courage to ask her out, but for the 
fear that they  would get  their  heads kicked in if Saotome 
found out.   Underneath  a table, mini-Ranko was waving around a 
smoking little bottle and chanting under her breath. She had 
worked out a spell which was meant to make Akane absolutely 
irresistible... And she was doing a good job of it too...
      Within  half  an hour of Akane seating herself  there,  
four long  standing  relationships  had broken up,  one  proposal  
for marriage  was shelved, a dozen men got slapped for letting  
their attention  wander, and at least one man was electrocuted  
by  his rather volatile alien fiance. 
      Ryoga,  who'd  been up until now  peacefully  devouring  
his lunch,  finally looked in Akane's direction. He knew  she  
looked familiar  from  somewhere... Then he remembered  the  
night  they kicked  Saotome out. He nodded idly to himself, that 
yes  it  was her... when the spell finally caught up with him as 
well...
      Now there's something that has to be understood about 
Ryoga. He didn't see the world the same way other people did. 
Since  his fiance left him a few years ago, his perceptions were  
constantly filtered through lenses of depression, anger or love 
sickness. It was part of the reason why he kept getting lost. He 
was so gloomy or seething that he would consistently 
misunderstand the simplest directions people gave to him. There 
were times when he would suddenly change directions, ignore road  
signs  and the  most  obvious landmarks because of  a scene he 
was replaying in his head. Something about Ranko's  spell  had 
affected  Ryoga... The tugging at his heart strings by the  spell 
urged  him up. Sped him forward. He walked like a man in a  daze. 
He was heading towards love... that was all he knew.
      Ryoga  walked  directly  towards Akane's table.  He  made  
a straight line, every so often, kicking a table out of the way  
or absently picking up students and tossing them over his  
shoulder. His   eyes  focused  firmly  forward.  Ranko  could   
see   Ryoga approaching  Akane with a glazed adoring expression 
on  his  face and chuckled to herself, "This is so perfect...". 
      Ryoga  proceeded  towards Akane's table. As he  reached  
the opposite  side  of  the table, Akane looked up  and  noticed  
him approaching.  She  recognized him immediately as one  of  
Ranma's friends.  She was about to say something in greeting  
when  Ryoga suddenly  made  a ninety degree turn and stomped 
off...  He  went through the door, tearing it from its hinges and 
disappeared from sight.
      Mini-Ranko,  Akane,  and just about everyone  else  
wondered what that was all about. Akane didn't have much time to 
mull over it as she saw a small group of women approaching her. 
"They  look familiar  for some reason..." mused Akane, "They were 
members  of that mob!" Akane put one hand to her hammer just in 
case...

      Ranma walked into the cafeteria and noted idly that  
someone had torn the doors from their hinges again. Probably 
Ryoga losing his  temper  again,  he mused. The men who  had  
taken  positions around  Akane's  table quietly but quickly 
drifted  away,  before Ranma  had  a  chance to notice them.  He  
found  Akane  chatting animatedly,  thick as thieves, with some 
girls who he knew to  be from his fan club. He approached 
cautiously.
      They all noticed him more or less simultaneously. Except 
for one, who still had her nose in a book. Akane smiled up at him  
as the other girls simultaneously said, "Hi, Ranma."
      The  girls all looked Ranma over with eager looks  on  
their faces. One of the girls asked Akane, "Really? In the 
bathroom?"
      Akane  smirked then nodded. The girls all blushed and  
there was even more awe in their faces than they normally 
displayed as they  looked at Ranma.
      "We'd better get going, Akane,  we've got classes." said 
the girl  with the book who stood up, blushing as she gave Ranma 
a quick glance. The other  girls  also quickly made their excuses 
and left before Ranma had a chance  to say anything.
      "Bye, guys," said Akane waving.
      Ranma sat opposite Akane and asked, smiling, "You seem to 
be getting along with... er... them."
      Akane nodded, "They're really very nice once you get to 
know them. They seemed a lot more reasonable just now, actually."
      Ranma  nodded, then said suddenly, "So, what were  you  
guys talking about?"
      "Nothing  much. Girl stuff. You wouldn't understand,"  
Akane said mysteriously.
      "Hah.  If  Ranko were here, that wouldn't be a  problem  
now would it?"
      "Maybe not. Why do you ask though?"
      "Well... I was having a sneezing fit back in class..."
      "You  thought  we were talking about you? Please,  how  
self centered can you get!" Akane did her best to cover up her  
blush. 
      What  was even more embarrassing was the fact that they had  
been talking about him.
      "I  didn't  say that, I was just asking  politely,  okay?!" 
replied Ranma sharply.
      "No it is not okay! Keep your nose out of my business!!"
      "Fine then! Be that way! I don't know why I bother with  
you anyway!" he said standing up.
      "Fine!!" Akane said as she walloped him into the floor.  
She realized  belatedly  that people were staring.  The  rumor  
mills cranked up again this time regarding the `one day fiance'.
      "Ow... what did you do that for?" groaned Ranma as he  
stood up, slowly.
      Akane just looked at the ground, looking remorseful.
      "Akane, what's wrong... I'm sorry I blew up..."
      Akane looked into his eyes and said, "I'm sorry too. I  
lost my  temper.  Actually  we were talking about you...  I  was  
just embarrassed..."
      "Aw,  come on Akane, you don't have to be embarrassed  
about that sort of thing with me..."
      Akane  merely smiled at him, "If your classes are  over,  
we may as well get going, then..."
      "Sure  thing," Ranma smiled back, as they  started  
walking, "By the way... what did they say about me?"
      "That's  for  me to know, Ranma..."  Akane  added  
wickedly, "Besides I told them a few things they didn't know 
about you..."
      "Like what?" asked Ranma worried.
      "Like where your birthmark is..."
      "You didn't! Which one..?"
      "All of them..."
      Their voices faded out of the cafeteria as they stepped 
into the  hall.  In  the  hours to come,  more  stories  and  
theories regarding  the two were passed around, and a few of the  
students decided to organize amongst themselves an Akane Tendo 
Fan Club...

      Mini-Ranko  had been listening to the entire  exchange  
from her perch on a chair's backrest. The groupies had spoken at 
length  of Ranma's looks, his honor, his kindness, his cute 
tush...
      She  had  to admit... Ranma wasn't all that bad  looking  
or that bad a person if she took the time to think about it. But 
one way  or another, she was going to get back home.  She  
considered talking to him about it, but quickly discarded that. 
Nice guy  or not, she knew he wouldn't let go of Akane that 
easily... which was a pity too she mused... he was wasted on 
her...
      Ranko's  line of  thought was suddenly interrupted by a 
small, sugary sweet voice saying "Oh! How cute! Martinique! 
Martinique!" The five inch tall Ranko suddenly felt herself 
grabbed and hugged almost to asphyxiation by Azusa Shiratori. 
Azusa was actually  in her  early twenties, but her mental and 
physical development  had been  arrested somewhere around the age 
of twelve. This left  her with  an  inclination  towards being  
disgustingly  cute  and  an overwhelming urge to grab anything 
she considered cute which came within  grasping  range, take it 
home and give it a disgustingly cute  French name,  not 
necessarily in that order. Added to all of  the  extra affection  
Ranko  had  been  pumping  into  the air ,  this resulted in a 
seriously and uniquely unstable personality.
      "OH, Martinique!" said the girl, cuddling Ranko's  doll-
like form.  The superdeformed Ranko, now being called Martinique,  
was hugged  to  unconsciousness and carried off by Azusa  who  
hummed a cute  little  song (which she had named Robispiere, the 
week previous) under her breath as she skipped  to  her  next 
class. Before she lost consciousness, Ranko noted to herself that 
she might have overdone the affection spell just a little...

      Kodachi  watched Akane and Ranma leave with a cold gleam  
in her  eye. So the little lovers weren't getting along  so  
well... That  little  tramp. She knew perfectly well, what Akane  
was  up to... Even now she could see it in the eyes of the men 
all around her...  they  didn't  want the Black  Rose  anymore  
they  wanted that... that... that hammer wielding hussy! The red 
headed  woman had  said  so...  The  Black Rose was the queen  of  
NIT  and  no newcomer was going to take that away from her... 
Kodachi  would  make  Akane Tendo pay.  Pay  most  dearly... 
Unable to stop the mirth which bubbled up from the depths of  her  
soul,  she  let  loose with a chillingly maniacal  laugh  as  she 
strode  out  of  the cafeteria, oblivious  to  the  stares  which 
followed her. She had so much to plan...

      Ranko finally managed to get away from Azusa. It took her 
an hour  and  she'd had to hide in one of the lady's room's 
cubicles,  but  she'd finally  managed  to get away. She was worn 
out from all  of  her power  use,  but she knew it was well worth 
it. Ranma would give up and tell Akane to take a hike soon 
enough, if she had her way...
	She  transformed herself  back  to her normal form and 
leaned  against  the  white tiled wall for a while, just as a 
cute girl with long straight pink hair came into the comfort 
room. The girl glanced at her strangely for a moment, but 
shrugged and calmly walked to the stand up urinals. Ranko was 
just about to leave when the door opened  and someone else 
entered. It took a moment for her to figure out that she had been 
hiding in the wrong comfort room the whole time... this was the 
MEN's room...

To be continued....

-----------------------

To Part 4
Email Author
Back to the That's One Half My Goddess index